I've got the squished down, flattened out, goin' to get the mammogram blues.

Ladies you know cos you have done it before
you've all walked up to that clinic door
you're here for the test cos you know it's the best
You got that squished down, flattened out,
goin' to get the mammogram blues.

The first thing you do, you gotta take off your shirt
you sure hate to do it cos you know it might hurt
to scan your breast, check the health of your chest.
You got that squished down, flattened out,
goin' to get the mammogram blues.

You walk right up to that big ole' machine
ya know its gonna tell you if your breasts are clean.
Your boobs get pressed and then you get dressed
You got that squished down, flattened out,
goin' to get the mammogram blues.


So I got in my car and drove to the place
Forty miles of a highway race
but my test was blocked cos the clinic was locked
I got that squished down, flattened out,
goin' to get the mammogram blues.



What's worse than having a mammogram?  Going all the way into Ann Arbor for one and not having it because the Dr's. office forgot to fax my requisition to the women's health center.  "Now, don't worry" said the perky voice on the other end of the phone when I called yesterday - "if you get to the health center and the requisition isn't there just have them call us and we will fax it right over."  So, trusting Pam the owner of the perky voice I made the 40 mile trip to my appointment.  Imagine my surprise when I got there and there was no requisition.  Of course, we called the Dr's office so they could fax it over and, guess what - they were closed.   The ironclad rule at the Women's Health Center is "No Requisition, No Mammogram."  So my trip was for nothing.

I have to say the whole incident made me extremely frustrated and angry.  In the past when I feel like this I get a self destructive urge to eat and eat. And eat some more.  I've been reading Geneen Roth's "Women, Food, and God" about accepting and feeling your emotions rather than numbing them with food.  Hence the flames.  Peaceful water just didn't do the trick in expressing how I felt.  I talked to my friend Julie on the telephone and she came up with the title of the little rhyme.  John and I did the rest and somehow, my anger has drained away.  I am calm peaceful and happy once more.  And I didn't eat my feelings.

By the way - feel free to send me additional verses or improve on mine.