I read an essay last spring that said that fat can't thrive in an environment of happiness. After I read it I began working on becoming proactive about being as happy as I can possibly be. I got the Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin and I started a Happiness Project group at the house once a week. It's something to look forward to on Mondays. I have to say I am happier now. Happier with my circumstances, happier with myself.
As a result of the happiness I decided to begin working on my weight in a more structured way. Last week I joined myfitnesspal.com and I am quite happy with the site. It is easy to use and the people are great, best of all it is very positive and encouraging. I lost my first pound this week. As I think about the pound that is gone I felt something I never expected to feel. Affection. I know that sounds weird. Affection? For Fat? Affection for myself? But the thing is - that pound of fat has been with me for the last 15 years. Maybe even longer. It was part of me. I think I mentioned last January that my nutritionist does not say 'lose weight' she refers to it as "releasing weight" and I think that's a good way to think about it. I released that pound. Hopefully, I will release many more.
Another thing that happened today is this. I have to back up a bit first tho. Recently I read the book "The end of overeating" and in it the author talked about how the food industry makes food hyper-palatable by loading it with sugar, fat, and salt. Today, I was offered a donut by the people in the office next door to me. I caved and took one. BUT I recorded it in my food log. As I ate it I thought about how it was hyperpalatable, smooth, rich, sweet. Exactly what the food industry engineered it to be. That was enough to make me set it aside. I thought 'I'll eat this later' but it kept calling me so I dumped it in the trash. A victory. The thing is I hate getting manipulated and the food industry is manipulating people to eat more that they need. I refuse to buy into it any more. Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm sure I will eat a donut from time to time, I will just be more aware of how it is engineered, I understand that eating it would taste good and the mouth feel would be good but the food won't be satisfying because it is engineered to make me come back for more.
Tomorrow I'm going shopping for real food. So there you have it - some random thoughts and weirdness on a Friday evening.
If you have things sitting around that you don't want to eat... pour salt on them! One thing I have found since starting MFP is that I can have junk food in the house and I can control it. I don't know why now and not before. I have Klondike bars, which I save for dessert on really hard workout days. I have sugar free pudding and low fat nilla wafers for dessert on other days. I have 3 different flavors of Pop Chips which I weigh out on my scale so I know I am only having 1 ounce. I do also eat more real food too. It's just about finding a balance. Also - red pears are in season I think, so go get some of those!!! They are way more delicious than a donut!
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